This misdirected message was inadvertently delivered to my inbox.
Sorry for the delay I hope it is not to late.
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Ti
> Sent: Wednesday, April 09, 1997 11:25 AM
> To: do@heavensgate.com
> Subject: Change of plans
> Priority: High
>
>
> STARDATE 10357.22 (March 28, 1997)
>
> To: Heaven's Gate Personnel:
>
> DUE TO EXTENSIVE TAIL WINDS CAUSED BY THE COMET HALE-BOPP,
> PICKUP OF THE 39 PASSENGERS HAS BEEN DELAYED UNTIL 3024
> WHEN WE PASS THE PLANET AGAIN.
>
> DO NOT EAT THE PUDDING AT THIS TIME
>
> *** REPEAT ***
>
> DO NOT EAT THE PUDDING AT THIS TIME
-------------------------------------------
The following is a direct quote from the Center for Strategic and
International Studies report on GLOBAL ORGANIZED CRIME; the author
who introduces the story swears it's true:
FBI agents conducted a raid of a psychiatric hospital in San Diego
that was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours
of reviewing thousands of medical records, the dozens of agents had
worked up quite an appetite. The agent in charge of the investigation
called a nearby pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick
dinner for his colleagues.
The following telephone conversation took place and was recorded by
the FBI because they were taping all conversations at the hospital.
Agent: Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of
soda.
Pizza Man: And where would you like them delivered?
Agent: We're over at the psychiatric hospital.
Pizza Man: The psychiatric hospital?
Agent: That's right. I'm an FBI agent.
Pizza Man: You're an FBI agent?
Agent: That's correct. Just about everybody here is.
Pizza Man: And you're at the psychiatric hospital?
Agent: That's correct. And make sure you don't go through the front
doors. We have them locked. You will have to go around to the back to
the service entrance to deliver the pizzas.
Pizza Man: And you say you're all FBI agents?
Agent: That's right. How soon can you have them here?
Pizza Man: And everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an FBI agent?
Agent: That's right. We've been here all day and we're starving.
Pizza Man: How are you going to pay for all of this?
Agent: I have my checkbook right here.
Pizza Man: And you're all FBI agents?
Agent: That's right. Everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember
to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We
have the front doors locked.
Pizza Man: I don't think so.
Return to the Joke Archive