An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed his options
with his doctor. The doctor said, "We have 3 possible donors; the 1st is
a young, healthy athlete who died in an automobile accident, the 2nd is a
middle-aged businessman who never drank or smoked and who died flying his
private jet. The 3rd is an attorney who died after practicing law for 30
years. Which do you want?"

"I'll take the lawyer's heart", said the patient.

After a successful transplant, the doctor asked the patient why he had
chosen the donor he did.  "It was easy", said the patient, "I wanted a
heart that hadn't been used."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A group of terrorists burst into the conference room at the Ramada Hotel, 
where the American Bar Association was holding its Annual Conventions. 
More than a hundred lawyers were taken as hostages. The terrorist leader 
announced that unless their demands were met, they would release one 
lawyer every hour.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, 
"I'm here because my house burned down, and everything I owned was 
destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything." 

"That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my 
house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance 
company also paid for everything."

The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?" he asked.