Ways to Annoy People
 
 1.  Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch
paper,99 copies.
 
 2.  In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
 
 3.  Specify that your drive through order is "to go."
 
 4.  If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while
talking to others.
 
 5.  Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
 
 6.  Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather 
conditions "to keep them tuned up."
 
 7.  Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
 
 8.  Practice making fax and modem noises.
 
 9.  Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them
to your boss.
 
 10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
 
 11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with
prophesy".
 
 12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands o
ver your ears.
 
 13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink 
cartridge across the room.
 
 14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
 
 15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, 
and insist to others that you "like it that way."
 
 16. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
 
 17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make 
a "croaking noise."
 
 18. Honk and wave to strangers.
 
 19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their 
complimentary mints by the cash register.
 
 20. TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.
 
 21. type only in lowercase.
 
 22. dont use any punctuation either
 
 23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
 
 24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?"
 What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
 
 25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
 
 26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the 
bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce, no, wait, I 
messed it up," and repeat.
 
 27. Ask people what gender they are.
 
 28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head 
like a parakeet.
 
 29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see
if they slow down.
 
 30. Sing along at the opera.
 
 31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
 
 32. Tell you friends 4 days prior, that you can't attend their party 
because you're not in the mood.
 
 33. Send this list to everyone in your email address book even
if they sent it to you or ask you not to send things like this.