You might be an X-er if...

you wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded up
into  a pouch you could wear around your waist.

you owned a Jordache pocket book (or several of them), or you remember
when Jordache jeans were cool.

in your  fifth grade class picture, you're wearing an Izod shirt with
the collar up

You were afraid of the Sleestaks on Land of the Lost

you know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song

the Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories

you remember the first time "Space: Above and Beyond" aired - it was
called "Battlestar Galactica"

You ever rang someone's doorbell and said "Landshark".

three words: "Atari"  "IntelliVision" and "Coleco".  Sound familiar?

you remember the days that hooking your computer into your television
wasn't an expensive option that required gadgets - it was the ONLY
WAY to use your computer!

you remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone
for the weekend"

you remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV

you ever owned a pair of "Pop-Wheels" - that handy little combination
of  shoe and roller skate that lasted about a year on the open market

a predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid"

you see teenagers today wearing clothes that show up in those
childhood photos, and they still look bad

while in high school, you and all your friends discussed elaborate
plans to get together again at the end of the century and play "1999" by
Prince over and over again

you remember when music that was labeled "alternative" really was

you, yes you, sat down and memorized the entire lyric sheet to "It's
the end of the world as we know it"

you took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van. You rode
in the back of the station wagon and you faced the cars behind you.

you've ever conversationally used the phrase "Jane, you ignorant slut"

you watched HR Puffenstuff as a child, but now that you're older, you
really understand that it would have been much better had you known
about drugs at the time

you've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following
phases:
 - "When I was younger"
 - "When I was your age"
 - "You know, back when..."
 - "Just can't (fill in the blank) like I used to"

Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the
English language

you're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD
thing, and you're ready to marry the next person who cards you when you
want to buy cigarettes.

you ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran Duran,
Madonna,or Cyndi Lauper video

the first time you ever kissed someone at a dance came during "Crazy
for You" by Madonna

you remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit the
streets and made your old Big Wheel quite obsolete

the phrase "Where's the beef?" still doubles you over with laughter

you read the "Hot Video Games Player's Secrets" guide for Mortal
Kombat just so you could find the hidden screen, and play Pong again
for old time's sake

honestly remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever
possibly get better special effects than those in the movie TRON.

you were convinced for years that Batman was a mildly overweight
man with a moderate beer belly who wore his underwear outside of his
clothes and talked strangely

(guys) your first wet dream occurred to thoughts of Jeannie, Marsha
Brady, Samantha from Bewitched or, for those hardcore comic fans out
there, Daphne from Scooby Doo, Josie or any one of her Pussycats

(girls) you thought Sean Cassidy was "dreamy", lusted after "Ted, your
ship's photographer" on the Love Boat and Chachi, or, to keep it fair
to the comically interested, thought Fred was just a hunk on Scooby Doo

you freaked out when you found that you now fall into the "26 - 50"
age category on most questionnaires

your hair, at some point in time in the 80's, became something which
can only be described by the phrase "I was experimenting"

this timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life: Star
Wars opens, you are still in single digit ages, and you think the
creatures are WAY cool.  Empire Strikes Back opens, you are now in early
double digit ages, and you are convinced that the special effects are much

better, the characters are cool, and you want one of every collectible  out

there. Return of the Jedi hits the theaters...you are now a teenager, and
you cannot get your eyes off Princess Leia's breasts or Han Solo's butt.
You fantasize forever and ever about it, and send off to join every fan
club for them on the planet, hangingposters, photos, and "teen"-type
magazine spreads all over your walls and lockers at school.

you've ever shopped at a Banana Republic or Benetton, but not in the
last five years, okay?

you're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affect YOU) that
maybe having the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a bad
idea after all

you're doing absolutely nothing with anything pertaining to your major

going to keg parties no longer involves hiding out in the woods when
the cops show up

you ever wanted to be gagged with a spoon

U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now

you ever used the phrase "kiss mah grits" in conversation

you remember trying to guess the episode of the Brady Bunch from the first scene.

you spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic Woman or
Wonder Woman or the Six Million Dollar Man

you had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding (on General Hospital)

you remember "Hey, let's be careful out there"

you're parents wanted you to attend medical school, but you decided
it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes, anyway.

you know who shot J.R.

this rings a bell: "and my name, is Charlie.  They work for me."

You ever wanted to learn to play "Stairway to Heaven" on the guitar.

You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on, after all, look at Tab.

You know all the words to the double album set of Grease.

You ever had a Dorothy Hammill haircut

You sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed
"8-6-7-5-3-0-9" to see if Jenny would answer.

"All-skate, change directions" means something to you.

You owned a pair of Rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear.

You bought a pair of Vanns and wanted to order a pizza in history
class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times as
Ridgemont High.

You owned a preppy handbook.

You were too young to go see the Blue Lagoon so you just had to
settle for second hand reports.

You remember when there was only "G, PG and R", none of this PG-13 crap.

You learned to swim about the same time Jaws came out and still carry
the emotional scars to this day.

Wonder twin powers, activate . . . form of a an iceberg, shape of a hammer

You remember when your cable TV box had the three rows of numbers
and you had to move the selector switch accordingly.

You ever actually tried to turn on a jukebox by hitting it twice and
saying  "heeey".